I’m hurting myself

I was a young girl… I wanted to make career and the reason was my family was broken. My dad was an alcoholic and my mom tries to pay bills and feed us. It was an interesting time and experience in my life.

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I knew that I need a good education to have a well-payed job to be an independent. And in the scenario, if my husband will be and alcoholic I can be independent and feed my kids easily.

Nothing about “who I am?”, “what I like?”, “what I want?”, “what’s in my heart?”.

And now!  25 years, master degree, well-payed job, career, marriage and 3 kids later I stop hurting myself!

I’m done with an IT. IT isn’t the thing I like / love or can’t live without. I was there, I was good but it’s time to move on. To do what I love, to find what I love, to be with my family and don’t think about “what if!?”.

I’m here and I’m free. Finally…..

“But life isn’t just fun and games!!” some say. But how do you know that!? Maybe for me, it is. I’ll figure that out. By myself, right now, right?!

Ilze


13 thoughts on “I’m hurting myself

  1. Throughout my career, I looked at all the things I was capapble of doing and chose the one that paid the most and best enabled me to do the things I really wanted to do (that meant six very different jobs in 40 years although the last one, in IT, lasted 19 years).
    Too many people have to spend their lives doing jobs they don’t enjoy, just to pay the bills and to have a short holiday. If you are able to support the life you want with a job you enjoy, go for it!

    Liked by 2 people

  2. May be this is the time you have to give yourself. May be this paves way to a new chapter in your life. The one you live for yourself. I came out of a job in marketing I was doing very well in because it did not make me happy for even a single day for 8 years ( except pay days 😉 ) and now here I am carving something new and I feel scared but I feel alive and happy.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. My husband is a great support! I’m not alone. I thought I am, but actually he is the one who encouraged me to change work 7-8 years ago when BOSS was too bossy! I stayed in that work for 2,5 years and every single day I had something I hated…I didn’t know that I’m the only who can decide or change my life :). And after I quit that bossy BOSS my life felt so good. I found another well-payed job easily. All you have to do is listen to your self… 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

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