Lately, I’ve been ill.
Nothing dramatic, nothing you can clearly point a finger at — just this exhausting, dragging 37.2 °C (about 99 °F) that keeps coming back. On paper it doesn’t sound like much, but in my body it feels awful. Aching muscles, heaviness in every limb, that strange “almost-flu” feeling, and a constant tiredness that pulls everything down — mood included.
I promised I’d be back on Monday.
Then another Monday passed.
And now it’s been two Mondays already.
I’m not good at looking back when I feel like this. I know a lot has happened — life always happens — but I can’t force myself to line it all up neatly. Even remembering what I did two weeks ago feels like too much effort. This blog post isn’t about documenting everything. It’s just a trace. Something for future me. When I skip writing, I usually end up scrolling through my camera roll to remember what life looked like. This is part of that record.
The kids have been sick too.
Today, two are home.
Last week, two were home as well.
It feels like we’re passing germs around instead of normal routines.
And still — the sun.
Four sunny days in a row. Actual light pouring through the windows. It’s terribly cold outside, around –17 °C (about 1 °F), but inside it’s warm, and the sun makes everything feel a little more bearable. Bright winter days have a quiet magic, even when your body isn’t cooperating.
There’s also my tooth.
I still can’t believe it’s been a year since those multiple drives to Riga, trying to sort things out. Now I’m waiting in line for a dentist closer to home — appointment planned on February 12. “Closer” still means a one-hour drive, but compared to two and a half hours one way, it feels like a luxury. I really hope this will become my new clinic.
They have a 360° X-ray, which is completely new to me. The idea of finally seeing everything — even potential problems that haven’t caused trouble yet — feels strangely reassuring. Especially because I’ve never really had tooth problems before. This whole chapter still feels unreal.
So this is where I am.
Not at my best. Not productive. Not neatly reflective.
Just tired, slightly feverish, surrounded by sick kids, winter sun, and waiting rooms — and doing the best I can with the energy I have.
And maybe that’s enough for now.
Ilze
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a day in the life of a latvian mom 
Hope you get back to normal soon. It’s 7 deg C here, but damp and grey, can’t wait for Springtime.
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Deep snow here… defenatly winter 🙂
I think I don’t know what is “back to normal” is anymore! Maybe this is normal!? I’m 42… not 25 anymore… but not 65 either… I thought “problems” would show up around 60.. And what are those “problems” older people are talking about? I have “problems,” and they are tiring… already!
I’m sorry, a bit depressed…
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My mum used to tell me about the winters in Latvia, lots of snow, we just seem to get 2 or 3 days of snow, then rain and grey days. Well I’m 73 and was out partying on Friday, didn’t get back to home until 3am, so there is still hope 😊
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Nice! Did you wake up at 11 am the next day, or were you up “normal time”?
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Oh blimey. Oh dear oh dear oh dear. -17C is very, very cold! What is
access to healthcare like where you are? can you talk to a doctor?
Virtual hugs and good wishes. x
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Oh, it really is cold 😬. Healthcare access is… complicated — I can talk to doctors, but getting proper answers or time off to actually recover isn’t easy, and this low-grade fever has been dragging on. I am keeping an eye on things, though. I think my “family doctor” isn’t interested in digging deeper into why this is happening…. I am…
Thank you so much for the virtual hugs and good wishes — they really mean a lot 🤍
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Ha ha, 9am felt tired all day.
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At least you had a party—memories and reason! I feel like that all the time, even without going out. Maybe I should go out more; at least then I’d know why I’m tired the next day.
Do you go out often, or was this a rare occasion?
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I go out 2 or 3 times a week, Friday is the late night one, I go to see my friends band play, but someone always suggests going for more drinks. I don’t have to look after a family. If I did, I’m sure I would be really tired, but it must be good to have a family around you.
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Ilze – there is a definite term called ‘mind-body medicine’ as what happens in/with one so affects the other. Methinks all the factors like winter and the kids also being ill and the short days and the frustration nothing is working and you quite cannot manage etc et al definitely adds to the physical ailments and feeling like a drowned pussycat. Take it slow, take it easy, do what you feel like doing and can and don’t count the days. . . or the years > you know I was a kid during WWII so I speak from experience > the best days definitely arrived after 50 !
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I hope you feel better soon, I’m sending you healing and positive energy 💫
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It’s really nice that you’re able to share your thoughts and feelings so openly. Writing can be such a quiet source of comfort. I’m sorry to hear that the snow feels heavy right now, and that you’re not feeling your best health-wise. Wishing you a gentle recovery and brighter, healthier days ahead.
Meanwhile, here in Kochi, we’re experiencing quite the opposite. Plenty of sunshine, along with its fair share of humidity.🙏🏻💛
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I feel for you, Ilze. There is so much illness here right now, just what you describe. First the horrible congestion and achiness that does not test as covid, flu or anything like that– but will not seem to go away. I’ve not felt super well for the past few weeks, either. Just absolutely exhausted. It’s best to not push ourselves (as if we could!) and ride it out. Looking forward to healthier days ahead, for all of us 🙂
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I’m glad your dental visit is done, my first thought on sickness was Long Covid, I sure hope not! Good to see you, Ilze! 😊
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We have had a Christmas month like that, too. Take your time. We’ll still be here
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Ceru kad driz jus visi atveselosieties. Man gruti mana vecuma tureties pret lielo aukstumu Florida sorit tikai 40 gradi F. Un salts vejs pus. Man ir tikai viens silditais ko varu lietot un parejais dzivoklis auksts.
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Great photos!
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Hope you feel better soon!
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